Thursday, September 6, 2012

For Our Parents

Dan and I just celebrated our 8 year wedding anniversary on Maui.  It was wonderful!  We relaxed, swam, shopped, ate, snorkeled, and loved not being on a schedule.  Dan's mom is in town this week, so she kept our babies while we got to escape and play.  2 nights and 3 full days.  It was the longest I've ever been apart from either of my children.



Which got me thinking.

Dan's mom mentioned that this stretch of time before she arrived was the longest time she had ever been apart from her son . . . or any of her children for that matter.  It had been 4 months.  It will be a total of 5 months before I get to see my Mom & Dad.  

They can say what they want, but we know who our parents talk about at work, who they send mail to, and who they want to talk to when they call.  They miss our babies.  They miss us, too.  But they REALLY miss our babies.  Being a long-distance grandparent is not what they asked for.  It is not what they pictured.  It's not what they would choose.  And yet they are still gracious, still encouraging, and still amazing.

This post is for them.


Dear Parents,

Thank you.

For teaching us to be resilient.  You taught us that change is just change and it is not something we should fear.  (Although you may be regretting that one now.)  You taught us to enjoy life and embrace adventure.


For not being angry when we told you we were moving.  (At least not to our faces.)  You were supportive.  Even while we packed up your grandchildren, you smiled as we told you what we were most excited about.  You were actually happy for us . . . . or you did an amazing job pretending so that we could be happy.  




For being willing to spend a small fortune to come visit us.  (Or maintain an entire filing cabinet to organize the credit cards with the best frequent flyer programs.)  


For being ever-present in our children's lives.  Of this we are perhaps the most thankful.  You Skype, FaceTime, call and send them mail.  Axel knows exactly what buttons to push to be able to talk to Papa.  Joslyn recognizes the sound the computer makes when she's about to see someone she loves.  They talk about you as if you live down the street, because in their minds you are not five time zones away.  You are a short click of a button.  You do not even know it, but you are also the persons at the other end of their toy phones.  



For allowing them to have once-in-a-lifetime experiences . . . all the time.  We credit this to you.  They have no idea that it isn't normal to swim alongside endangered sea turtles, or to watch a Hawaiian sunset over pizza on a Tuesday night.  Thank you for always being excited to hear about what they've done today, even though we know you would rather them be eating pizza at your dining room table instead.  Most days they would, too. 


For listening when things here are not quite so perfect.  For encouraging us when the job is hard, or the culture is just too different.  You have never hinted that this move was a mistake, or suggested that we have brought hard times upon ourselves.  You continue to mentor, continue to listen, and continue to be gracious.   



We can not fathom what it would be like to be an ocean apart from our children.  We do not understand what it would be like to be a grandparent.  We do, however, take notes on what we have seen from you.  Your love, encouragement and composure can only come from God, which is where we, too, will seek when our children decide to drop a bomb-shell on us.  When that happens, and until that happens, we will follow your example.  

And when that happens, feel free to remind us that we brought it upon ourselves.  

We love you,

Dan & Kaysi